Given my recent state of mind lately I have decided that going as an inmate in the psych ward was the most fitting costume. I had it all figured out....but then it morphed into a Mom who had been admitted to the psych ward with a calendar and to do list. In the end thought I decided to go as ME 14 years ago! Hair in a ponytail, lipstick smeared across my face, baby puke on my shoulder and a Cabbage patch doll posing as Ally I suddenly was transformed to my former self. Of course I still wore the orange jumpsuit because quite frankly back then I should have been committed on most days.
Yeah....I'm sexy.
After a few hours unfortunately the sour cream I used for baby puke turned clear and ended up looking more like Monica Lewinsky's dress. (my daughter Ally was so nice to point that out to me. ) My daughter of course looked gorgeous as always. She could wear a paper bag and it would look like high fashion couture.
While everyone else chose the typical tv reality stars and zombies, I chose a much scarier concept.....facing the fact that becoming a new mom nearly drove me insane! Don't get me wrong, my daughter is the best thing I have ever accomplished......that being said, I don't know who possibly thought that it was ok to send her home with me after giving childbirth. I was 23. I could barely take care of myself or our newly acquired puppy. Children should have owner's manuals. Upon leaving the hospital you have make sure your child has a name, the bills need to be paid and the hospital should be required to give u an owners manual and access to a 24 hour emergency hotline. We can't drive cars without a license, we can't get married without a license, we can't open a business or build a house without a license yet, for some reason any person is allowed to have a child without any guidance. No wonder each passing generation is more screwed up than the last!
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